Welcome to the Sunday Mangled poem. Every week I post a mangled poem, sometimes it’s something simple with no point other than to point out that there are some terrible poems out there, or to demonstrate just how badly I can do poetry. I do this in celebration of some of the published poems I have read that make my brain hurt.
This week I celebrate that Poem that repeats the same word over and over again, because that’s almost like rhyming.
The storm is bright inside your eyes,
The clouds roll deep inside your eyes,
There’s a place that we go inside your eyes,
I want to escape inside your eyes,
I can spend forever inside your eyes,
Please share with me your mangled poem.
Remember that it doesn’t have to be good, it just has to be.
Thank you!
August 17th, 2008 at 3:24 pm
I love people who look me in the eyes. It makes me feel special. Appreciated. Wanted.
August 17th, 2008 at 3:47 pm
I want to play in the sand,
To curl my toes in wet sand,
To build castles made of sand,
To walk hand in hand across the sand.
Better this time?
August 17th, 2008 at 5:43 pm
Beauty and love are made into words.
When you speak, I hear your words.
Sighs and tingles for those words.
Dreaming haze, they need more words.
I call out, can you hear my words?
Voice is faint, but there are still words.
Even I, try to deny those words.
After all they are just words.
This was really hard…picking one word was difficult!
August 17th, 2008 at 6:58 pm
Claudia, I totally agree, they say the eyes are the gateway to the soul, and I like to see all that is behind that gateway.
August 17th, 2008 at 6:59 pm
Carolyn, I love your poem, I read it and thought that it’s amazing that a poem with so many uses of the same word can be so poetic and right. My thought is “that’s not mangled at all!”
Thank you!
August 17th, 2008 at 7:02 pm
Harmony, you have such a talent for poetry, and reading your poem, it amazed me that by using the same word at the end of each line really keeps the poem centered to a theme, and that is increadible. It’s like the opposite of last week where the meaning didn’t matter as long as it rhymed, now it’s like the meaning is key. I love it! Brilliant job!
August 17th, 2008 at 7:35 pm
i love it when you look at me
i love the way you hold me
i’m in heaven when you touch me
i’m in another world when you kiss me
your heart sings to me
your soul fills me
August 17th, 2008 at 9:17 pm
Time is running away.
I’d like to run away.
Play and play far away.
I think it’s time I went away.
August 19th, 2008 at 8:19 am
I really love this post.
I can truly feel this post.
You did a great job on this post.
Wonderful poem in this post.
August 19th, 2008 at 6:53 pm
I drank too many beers.
It’s not good to write a poem after too many beers.
I do really like beers.
I would not rather write a poem than drink a lot of beers.
August 19th, 2008 at 9:31 pm
I used to hate the lines around my eyes,
but then I realized they were my stamped passport.
Proof that I have lived.
August 19th, 2008 at 10:48 pm
Singing Angel, I love your poem, if I keep getting quality like this I’ll have to change the name from mangled to “increadible.
August 19th, 2008 at 10:49 pm
Omama, you seem so inspired with your comment, it takes me away.
August 19th, 2008 at 10:49 pm
Kathryn, Thank you so much for your poem, I do hope it’s heart felt, I enjoy these mangled poetry posts.
August 19th, 2008 at 10:50 pm
ALF, lol, the double edged sword of picking one word to really represent the poem, such a beautiful focus on the beers.
August 19th, 2008 at 10:53 pm
Word Girl, Thank you for your words, with every year I get older and in no other year have I noticed it as much as this one. I’m using the lotion around my eyes, hoping to keep the skin as elastic as possible, I hope I don’t fail too much.
Your statement about the eyes being a passport, the proof that you have lived… it’s poetic and means so much for me as I do get older. I heard someone the other day in the book store mention that they paid for their age. Though by the look of her, and the intelligence of her conversation I think she might have done well to buy quality and not quantity. Thank you for your comment.